How’s your week been? Mine’s been so mixed it’s untrue. On the one hand it’s been super happy, exciting and fun. On the other it’s been extremely stressful, hard and no fun at all. How is that even possible? Unfortunately I fear it’s because it’s life.
Food wise it’s been an incredibly challenging week. It was Oscar’s 2nd birthday on Wednesday. This bought with it wonderful celebration but also much reflection. Like everything this week, it was Happy/Sad. And with celebration and stress (in my life anyway) seems to come food. I’m not saying I went crazy, but I did have things I wouldn’t normally have even entertained. And once I started, I could feel the control slipping. It started on Friday with Chinese take away (which we had at my suggestion after a great piece of news and having a particularly difficult day – happy/sad). On Saturday we took Oscar and his friend for dinner to ASK Pizza (kind of like Pizza Express). Despite there being various more healthy options (Seafood pasta or risotto would have been lovely), what I really wanted was pizza. I met myself half way and had a kind of sauceless cheeseless pizza, topped with steak, rocket and salsa verde. This was quickly followed by birthday cake, that I hadn’t planned to eat. I couldn’t even begin to syn any of this or the roast I made on Sunday.
I started to feel like “well what the hell – I’ve ruined this week why bother trying any more”. I’ve heard others talk about this feeling, but I’ve not really experienced it myself before and man it sucked. I started to feel so out of control that I seriously (for about a minute) considered not weighing in. How could I face myself on Tuesday? The thought was fleeting and quickly told it was bloody nonsense. But still. I’ve never once considered not weighing in, regardless of how my week has gone and I think this is more symptomatic of the changes I’m experiencing throughout the rest my life and how unsettled this is leaving me, than any real mistrust in group. Anyway, I knew that despite the wobbles I’d had, the very best thing I could do, was to put it behind me and look forward. As someone said last night, there are 7 days in a week. 7 opportunities to start afresh. And while I’m not one to use “tomorrow is another day” excuse regularly (I can’t be – I did that for so long and look where it got me), occasionally it’s the only thing you can do. Accept what has happened, don’t allow it to take over and move on.
So I did. And last night I lost 0.5lb. I know it wasn’t the 1lb I set myself last week, but to be honest I couldn’t have been happier. That’s a total of 5 Stone 4.5lb (74.5lb).
We all doubt our ability now and then (I assume – maybe you don’t. And if not, high five to you!) But seeing that loss just confirmed to me that despite the hiccups and the stumbles I have along the way I do know how to do this. I need to listen to my quiet voice and trust.
While I remember here is another picture I took this week. I bought these boots from Evans last October. I loved them then and I still love them now. They’re leather so I know they will have stretched (and please ignore how faded they are – my bad for not cleaning them enough!), but even so. I’ve never had a pair of long boots look this loose on me and I wanted to share.
I’ll be weighing in on Thursday next week as I have no lift to Liphook, so expect my next update on Friday. I would like to loose 2lb this week to start making a real in roads into the 6.5lb I want to loose by May (as explained last week).
Have a great week
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