Ignorance is bliss….

I’m sat here. I’m trying I get some work done, a bit of writing in the hour or so I have left before I need to collect Oscar from preschool. Because I have nowhere comfortable to work at home and because the walk to preschool and back doesn’t make going home worth it, I’m in a local coffee shop. Who am I kidding I’m in the ice cream shop. And doing what I do every week.

When I came in the place was empty, but a group of three obviously very new mothers have just come in. They’re probably NCT or antenatal group friends. I remember doing something similar when I had just had Oscar. They chat excitedly about sleep and feeding and house prices (well this is Surrey after all). The pride in their little ones and their new status as mamas clear. And it makes me sigh.

I remember bits about Oscar being this small. I remember going for coffee and being able to drink a whole cup with my girls without Oscar making a noise. I remember the excited chattering about how much sleep we’d had, the latest things our babies had done and about this whole new world we were just starting discovering.

But I also remember how hard it was. The panic in all of our eyes when we were unsure of what was going on (which was much of the time), the lack of sleep, the fear, the dread that we, that I, was getting it all, all wrong.

I remember mothers, experienced mothers, telling me to enjoy how portable my baby was at that age. I just remember thinking they were barmy! Thinking ‘look how much stuff he needs. How is this portable?’ But they were right. He was. I could just pick him up (along with a bulging changing bag) and just go. Anywhere.

I’m sat here listening to these women (one of who has pretty impressive mascara on, and coordinated clothes! Who is this super woman?) and I want to tell them. Yell at them, to enjoy this time. Tell them that whatever they’re doing they’re NOT doing it wrong and to just enjoy it. Enjoy the meet ups, relax in the company of other new mamas and bask in the ignorance of what’s to come. I think perhaps that’s what I miss the most. The ignorance of how hard this journey was going to be.

I could, but I won’t. They wouldn’t listen even if I did. Why would they? I didn’t.

They say first time motherhood, when you have nothing to do but love and look after your baby is wasted on the scared, fearful and unconfident first time mother and there is truth in those words.

So here’s my plea to you. Mama’s enjoy your babies, because they won’t be babies for long.

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Comments

  1. A very true post….The do grow up so quickly! It is scary how the time flies.

  2. Ah what a lovely post. And you are dead right. Those first few months are a whirlwind. It definitely slows down as you transition in to motherhood, but I still am not actually sure it gets much better! 🙂 #mummymonday

    • mrssavageangel says:

      Thank you so much! I know what you mean. My boy is 3.5 now. I know that’s not old but it’s a million miles away from the baby he once was.

  3. Love this Lisa so true! Wish I could role back to that time (just for a day though) Maybe that is what being a grandparent is about? #twinklytuesday

    • mrssavageangel says:

      Thank you Catie! I don’t dwell on it usually, it just hit me square between the eyes yesterday. I think you’re right though Grandparenting is where its at hahaha!

  4. I remember getting worked up over whether people would judge me for which baby wipes I used or whether I had dressed Tyger in the right outfit for his age. I was always so worried about doing it ‘right’. As if anyone cared! I wasn’t keen on the baby phase but I guess he may have cried most of the time but at least he couldn’t run off. Leaving the house gets even harder with two.

    Great post (and I’m not stalking you either – honest).

    #TwinklyTuesday

    • mrssavageangel says:

      HAHAHAHA! Stalk away. I truly didn’t appreciate how hard having a ‘runner’ would be. He walks no where and wont hold my hand. My hearts in my mouth whenever we try. That’s why he’s mostly still in a buggy, but that wont last much longer. Ahhh for the days when I picked him up and off we went! I can’t image how hard it must be with two. More power to you lady!

  5. Time really does fly, my son is 3 1/2 and my daughter 5 months, the last few months have flown by! Lovely post.

    #mummymondays #twinklytuesday

    • mrssavageangel says:

      Thank you so much Helen. I bet they have. I hear second time round is completely different in all sorts of ways, but I hope you’re enjoying it!

  6. My first time as a new mum was slightly different from most, in that I had two babies. There wasn’t time to worry about whether I was getting it wrong or right… I literally just had to get on with it. I guess it did me a favour!! hings have got easier for me, rather than harder…. for now at least 😉 Thanks so much for linking up with us xx #TwinklyTuesday

  7. So true, I can’t even attempt to sit in a coffee shop with Archie now it would just be chaos. We do try to go out for family meals occasionally to quieter restaurants mid week when we know there’ll be less sensory issues for him. When he was a baby we didn’t need to consider half the factors we need to now he’s almost three! xx #TwinklyTuesdays

  8. moderatemum says:

    I have so many lovely memories of the two of us. Cuddles in the mother and baby cinema. Long coffees in empty cafes. Long lunch dates as my baby snored beside me. x

    • mrssavageangel says:

      Now that’s something I never did – mother & baby cinema. We talked about it, but never got round to it. What a shame. What lovely memories. So glad you have them 🙂

  9. moderatemum says:

    Thank you and thanks for linking up x

  10. Sigh…I find it quite alarming that our culture generally tells mothers to “enjoy every minute” while at the same time yelling “careful, you have no idea what you’re doing, your baby might break!”. Is there a way to give new mums some extra confidence? Thanks for sharing #fromthehet

    • mrssavageangel says:

      That’s such a good point Julia, we really really do live in an age where Social media tells you you should be having the best time and the authorities removes any power you might have to do so. No wonder first time mothers are confused beyond measure!

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