Alone

The sun is streaming through my lounge window. The lounge is as tidy as it ever gets. The house is not quiet, its peaceful. And I feel reborn.

Its hard to explain how having my four year old start school has made me feel. Yes it’s been sad and yes it’s been heart wrenchingย but it’s also been somewhat liberating. In a way I wasn’t expecting.

I have yet to clean the house. I will, I promise, but I’m just taking my time. My time. Time for me. Imagine that!

Hot coffee. Peaceful toilet trips. Sometimes I feel like I’m just sitting in stunned silence.

I have used my new office just once this week. I will use it more, but at the moment I’m getting used to being in the house, my house, alone. I didn’t realise how rarely that had actually happened in the last four years until now. Even the peaceful times when Oscar was younger, were when he was napping. He was here and I was ‘en garde’ so to speak. Now there is no one here. Just me.

I’m listening hard. And hoping to hear myself.

For the first time in a long time.

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Comments

  1. I bet it does feel strange, total quiet, just your thoughts alone. I’m exactly the same when my daughter and husband go out without me. It’s a weird feeling!

  2. I feel a bit like this with three of my four at school/pre-school and today my youngest is out with my parents. There isn’t a single sound in the house and it’s really quite strange! I could get used to this! #picknmix

  3. It must be amazing that length of peace. My two boys are at school but the baby is with me and he sleeps but you never that that total silence. Must be lovely #picknmix

  4. Ha it is a weird feeling to start with, I do enjoy the peace as much as I miss them all sometimes ๐Ÿ˜‰ Thanks for linking up to #PicknMix lovely

    Stevie x

    • mrssavageangel says:

      Yeah I’m sure I’ll start missing him at some point. Hasn’t happened yet though hahaha ๐Ÿ˜‰ This space has been a long time coming!

  5. What a beautiful post. It shows just how important time to yourself is! A gorgeous last sentence and I totally understand the sentiment. I hope you do hear yourself it certainly sounds like you are. Blogging at its best! Thank you for linking up to #ablogginggoodtime ๐ŸŽ‰

    • mrssavageangel says:

      You are just so sweet. Thank you so much honey! It just hit me one morning how much I appreciate this time. It’s been a long time coming!

  6. Aaaww a quiet peaceful house is almost magical!!! My lot are going to grandma’s next weekend and there’s a possibility I’m counting down the days! #ablogginggoodtime

  7. I can imagine how strange it feels. I miss my daughter when she’s at nursery if I’m at home alone but my goodness I appreciate that time #ablogginggoodtime

  8. It is strange. There have been a few times already when I’ve finished everything I wanted to do and was stunned to find that it was 10:00 AM! Amazing how much more productive you can be, though I do miss my little munchkin #bloggingoodtime

    • mrssavageangel says:

      Oh my god yes. I keep thinking I’ve been working so hard it must be at least lunch time but no, its only 10. Amazing!

  9. Jane started pre-school this year. That’s it, 3rd kiddie no longer needs me 24/7. It’s amazing how I can fill the time she is away, they are away with.. nothing really. #ablogginggoodtime

  10. Beautfully written as always Lisa. I felt like this when M started nursery – I had to turn the radio on because the house was so quiet! You do get used it though and it’s really nice to be able to have time for yourself again! #PicknMix

  11. It’s so strange isn’t it? Strange but nice. My boy started 15 hours a week st play school in September and on a Monday I have 6 hours to myself! I found it quite lonely at first but now I am enjoying having that time for myself. I’m glad you’re enjoying your alone time xx #ablogginggoodtime

    • mrssavageangel says:

      I’m conscious that it could become lonely. I’m trying to arrange things to do so I actually get out and talk to other humans!

  12. Hi Lisa. I still love those moments, although now my son has finished school and is at home a lot of the time now, they are too few and far between. Enjoy those peaceful moments. Before you know it your little one will be charging back and disrupting the peace!

    xx

  13. Sounds marvellous – can I come round please?! #ablogginggoodtime

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