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mrssavageangel

First time mother just trying to figure out where to go from here.

I have learnt

I have learnt

28/09/2016 by MrsSavageAngel Leave a Comment

A week. I’ve been a school boy’s mum for a week. Or in fact over a week. And I can’t quite believe it.

Maybe I should write a ’10 things I have learnt about school age children/having an SEN child in a mainstream school/the school gate’ post. They seem to be popular. But to be honest I’m not sure I’ve learnt very much about any of those things.

I know I’ve learnt that sending my child off to school in tears breaks my heart in ways I was absolutely not expecting.

I’ve learnt I can hold my tears back when he really needs me to. And that they will engulf me when I let them go.

I’ve learnt that having a child beg to stay home while hiding under the duvet, a thing he has NEVER done before, and yet staying calm and collected and kind but firm is ridiculously hard.

I’ve learnt I don’t care about what he’s actually doing in the day, as long as I hear he’s OK.

I’ve learnt how proud a silly little sticker can make me.

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I’ve learnt my capacity to stay on message is immense and, for Oscar, the very kindest thing I could possibly do.

I’ve learnt that when he’s ready to ‘tell’ me things he will.

I’ve learnt how amazing my son’s capacity for communication actually is, even if that includes play acting with his very favourite soft toys.

I’ve learnt that when Oscar asks to take a bear to school with him, I will secretly squeeze and whisper to that bear to please look after him.

I’ve learnt about my son’s capacity to find coping mechanisms quickly and appropriately.

I’ve learnt how quickly I can turn around a load of dirty uniform.

I’ve learnt that I was ready to let him go. And to have him come back.

I’ve learnt the joys of time.

I’ve learnt that my mind will still automatically jump to how to manage a situation for Oscar, even if he’s not there.

I’ve learnt how much people are rooting for Oscar.

I’ve learnt how supportive my community is. And how much I truly appreciate that.

OK, so maybe I have learnt a few things. Unexpected things, learnt through painful lessons. But learnt none the less.  I cried every day last week. But only one day so far this week. I didn’t cry yesterday. I didn’t cry today.

I’ve learnt that he will cope.

I’ve learnt that I will cope.

boy on path
On his way

Filed Under: Autism, Children Tagged With: asc, asd, Autism, childhood, children, Development, first week, I have learnt, I've learnt, Motherhood, mummy, new lessons, School, school mum, Starting school, Thanks

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Totally petitioning to move Bonfire night to June. Totally petitioning to move Bonfire night to June. It’s not so dark you lose your family, it’s way warmer and the sky just looks more dramatic. Much more fun all round.
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What an amazing day! The little sister who came in What an amazing day! The little sister who came into our lives when she was a sweet little ten year old, is now a beautiful, strong wife and mother. We couldn’t have been any prouder to share her day with her. Oh yeah and James was there too 😜 Only kidding we love you guys so much! #family #wedding
All the chocolate, all the good food. Happy Easter All the chocolate, all the good food. Happy Easter, Passover or Ramadan. Hope you’re spending today with your people. 💐🐰🌱 #spring #celebrate
New favourite cousin photo! #thuglife #jessandosca New favourite cousin photo! #thuglife #jessandoscar
Oscar’s party was a roaring success. The cousins Oscar’s party was a roaring success. The cousins all came and played together like they were best of friends, the Minecraft themed food was devoured, the castle was bounced to within an inch of its life, the grown ups chatted and most of all the boy had the best day! And now I’m so exhausted I’m off to bed. Thank you to the family (and chosen family) who helped make it such a special day for our special little guy. #whenoscarturnedten #happybirthday #familypartiesarethebest
Ten years old. Where has that decade gone? He’s Ten years old. Where has that decade gone? He’s ten years old. I’m ten years older. Sometimes it feels like we’re growing up together! Happy birthday beautiful boy. And Happy Birthing Day to me. 🥰
It’s that time of year again when I lay all his It’s that time of year again when I lay all his presents out and say I’m ready for him to be another year older and then quip that I am NEVER ready for him to be another year older. But 10 man? I don’t know, it feels so… significant. Double digits, a decade, it somehow feels different from all the other birthdays. I can’t quite believe it tbh. Anyway as he’s having his birthday here (tomorrow) but his party in Plymouth next Saturday it has been decreed it’s his birthday all week. And what with the grand age he’s turning, I think that sounds perfectly appropriate.
Breakfast in bed (toast and a makeshift cloche - w Breakfast in bed (toast and a makeshift cloche - we fancy!) and three cards and a sunflower he planted from seed at school 😱! Now off out for lunch. Very much a Happy Mothers Day to me! And to all the mamas I know. May you be treated like Kweens today!
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