journey

Over the last few years I’ve had so many people tell me how hard they have found it to start losing weight. I hear them. It’s no lie when people say the first step is the hardest. So here’s a couple of things I’ve learnt about starting a weight loss journey.

Moffat-Drive

1. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve tried before, the first step on a weight loss journey never gets any easier.

You might have all the knowledge and the nutrition info and all the tools you need to start losing weight, but if you’ve taken a break from healthy living, getting back into it never gets any easier. Newbies and veterans alike struggle to take that first step and all should be applauded for doing so.

2. YOU have to really want to do it.

You can pay lip service to wanting to lose weight all you like, but if you don’t want to do it deep down in your soul it won’t work. The commitment to changing is something that takes passion and if you don’t feel it, why on earth would you stick to it? Likewise if you’re just doing it because you ‘feel you should’ or for someone else’s benefit, you’re never going to truly get it. And that’s fine. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready. You, and only you will know when it’s time ?

3. There is no ‘right’ way

Now you might think this is weird coming from someone who has enjoyed the Slimming World plan for several years now, but I stand by that statement. What what works for me, might not work for you and vice versa. You know you better than anyone in the world. You are the only one who can say what is going to work for you. You dig Slimming World and feasting on large portions? Fantastic! Green smoothies and the gym your thing? You go girl! You prefer to count calories? Amen to that! Never let anyone else tell you what kind of weight loss journey is best for you.

4. Be prepared

Now this could mean one of two things really. Firstly being prepared with the right kinds of foods in the house etc is sooooooo helpful. You try starting any kind of healthy living with a house stuffed the gunnels with chocolate, wine and crisps and you’re not giving yourself even a fighting chance. And if you have to have these things in for other people, try moving them out of eye line and get your preferred foods in their place.

Secondly it could also mean being prepared for how hard the beginning might be. Changing foods is one thing, but changing behaviours is a whole other ball game and it doesn’t happen over night. If you’ve been eating pretty much what you want, when you want, for a long time, changing that behaviour could take a while. Be prepared to have to literally think about everything you do and eat until it becomes second nature. It might take a while. Don’t be surprised by that and just accept it’s the way it will be.

5. Set small goals

For the love of all that is beautiful in this world, please don’t start any weight loss journey with just your end weight in sight, particularly if, like me, that is a loooong way away. I still don’t know where I’d finally like to get to because it’s never been near enough to be an achievable goal. Smaller goals are achievable and any life coach or motivation ‘guru’ will tell you achieving a series of smaller realistic goals will help keep you going. And the more goals you reach the more positive reinforcement you’ll get. By all means have a figure or a place in mind, but remember to set smaller goals within that figure. Could be a number of lbs lost or a size of clothing you want to wear or how you feel at a particular time. By breaking it down you’re more likely to get there.

6. Be your own cheerleader

Probably one of the most important things in beginning any weight loss journey is to make sure you celebrate your own success. And publicly if you can bring yourself to. We all have to be motivated to do anything in this life (would you go to work if you didn’t get paid?) and losing weight is no different. Please, please, please don’t ever put your weight loss down, say it’s not that good or not as good as someone else. Losing weight can be bloody hard work, so why would you ever put any loss down as ‘not good enough’? You get out there and you shake those pompoms! You might find it awkward to begin with, but every pat on the back you give yourself will just reinforce that you’re doing the right thing. And if others join in, well all the better ?

Making the decision to change in your life is never easy, but I swear once you take that first step, over the mental block that’s stopped you doing it in the first place, you’ll have done half the hard work already.

Good luck?!

love

Lisa

xxx

So, it’s been 6 weeks since we had the meeting where it was agreed my gorgeous, floppy haired baby was just a little different from the other children. 6 weeks since I wept on my husband in a hospital corridor. 6 weeks since we felt one weight lifted and another replace it. 6 weeks since Oscar was diagnosed as “autistic”.

We’re getting on pretty well I think. Oscar’s speech gets better every week. Every day brings new words, new phrases, something else to amaze and baffle me. Three weeks ago, out of the blue, he started to say “Thank You” whenever you give him something or do something for him. Sometimes it’s even “Thank you mom mom”. He’ll even point it out if you don’t say ‘thank you’ when someone gives something to you! He can’t speak but suddenly he’s the politeness police? What the heck? And I say ‘heck’ because that’s another things he’s started doing, repeating the words you really don’t want him too! Like “Oh My God!”. And “Balls!” And the “f” word you never want them to say in front of their preschool teacher! It’s not that I swear all the time, but the fact that I didn’t have to worry about him repeating back what I said, meant I didn’t think to moderate my language ages ago. Like my friends did. Ahh well! At least it means he’s taking it in I guess? Sigh!

His behaviour is getting better and better too. His eye contact has gone from shaky to amazing in just four small months. He approaches other children now, be it friends in the garden, those at nursery or strangers in the park. He’s learnt a simple “Hello” opens all sorts of doors, particularly games of chase. There’s still nothing Oscar loves more than running around, but he’s now allowing other children to get in on the act. Even more amazingly he’s started to play games initiated by other children. Slowly slowly catchy monkey as they say, but last week he was approached at preschool, by a little girl, asked to play a game and he did. I think his TA was as shocked as I was when she told me.

Don’t get me wrong he still gets upset about things. Frustration is clear on his beautiful little face when he can’t get what he wants or do what he wants. But now he looks at me while he cries. And his bottom lip wobbles. He rarely hits himself and the anger goes as quickly as it came. These are tantrums of a toddler. We rarely see the blind panic of a melt down that can take over a hour to calm any more. But when we do, we’re coping with them better. Staying calmer, giving him that safe place he needs. We’re also a lot better at avoiding situations that could push him to that place beyond. We try not to make a big deal about it and that’s helping I think. For example, some birthday parties work for us, others (the sit down and watch kind) don’t. Yet. Give him time.

Yeah all in all, he’s progressing brilliantly. And yet as he gets easier, the stress of him is replaced by the stress of what his diagnosis brings with it. A hundred forms to fill in, a thousand things to read, new people every week, a new language (mainly made up of acronyms), advice, process, meetings. Getting everything set up to support my little guy, comes at a human cost. Me. I tell you what, it’s lucky I was an Account Manager for five years. Little else could have prepared me so well to deal with so many agencies all at once. Plate spinner extrodinaire that’s me. Only this time I’m not getting paid for it. But on the plus side neither do I have to work in Hoxton Square with all the hipsters, so you know, swings and roundabouts 😉 .

I’m not trying to brag here, but I feel like I need to keep some kind of record of the journey, of his milestones that would mean so little to anyone else. Heck ( 😉 ) who am I kidding, yes I am bragging. I’m so ridiculously proud of my baby and how he’s coming on that it’s worth all the forms and all the meetings and all the stress.

Last week someone told me what a polite little boy I had, after he said Hello, Please, Thank You and Goodbye, all perfectly and all in the right place. I didn’t cry, because seeing me sad upsets him, but I was crying inside.

Crying with happiness.

...handsome boy. — …handsome little boy.

journey

How to start a Weight Loss Journey

6 weeks on – our ASD journey