To the dickhead who shouted YUMMY MUMMY at me as I walked my toddler son home from nursery.
What a compliment. I thought I’d let you know you were half factually correct. I am indeed a mummy, although to you I was just an arse in a pair of jeans pushing a buggy. I could have been a nanny or a childminder, you didn’t know, but well done for being spot on with that bit. As for yummy, well now that’s highly objective. I’m sure my husband would agree with you. As much as I’m sure he wouldn’t mind at all that you shouted so loud at his wife, as you sped past in your van, that she nearly jumped out of her skin and lost control of the buggy, the very thing that made you assume she was a mummy in the first place, yummy or otherwise. After all you’d be fine with someone shouting at your wife and child in the same way wouldn’t you? I mean you must be. Otherwise you wouldn’t have done it to me.
It’s not a question.
I also just wanted you to know you woke my son up. On a road full of busy traffic, you shouted so loud as to wake an already sleeping child. Man, you’ve got some lungs on you. So thanks for that too. I can’t tell you how much your…well what was it, flirting, joking, abuse, was appreciated. I really can’t. At all.
But maybe it’s time to knock this sort of behaviour on the head. No woman really gets her self esteem kicks from strangers, particularly those screaming loudly at a mother and her baby. I’m not suggesting they don’t. I’m telling you they don’t. So please stop it.
Just fucking STOP IT.